I quit having suicide attempts when I had my first child (preemie due to my drinking & smoking while pregnant--talk about guilt, but I wasn't under treatment then for my bp). My mother committed suicide & I know what a horrible impact that has on the kids left behind so my children gave me a purpose when I couldn't find one for myself. Now since I've been on the right meds I've found hope & even joy--something I never thought possible--so keep trying--it took me 35 years to get the right dx & right meds.--Suzy