Quote:
Originally Posted by Edda
It is something I'm personally affected by but I'm sure I'm not the only one so I'm posting it more as a general question.
Suppose that you are in a relatively (and intended) long term relationship with someone. You both seem to have the same values about monogamy. Then, after a year or so your partner starts acting oddly; withdraws, no communication for weeks etc. You get suspicious, confront him and he admits that he is married. He insists that he doesn't love the wife, he is not in a relationship with her any more, etc.
You are shocked and ask him how come he never mentioned this little detail. He says "you never asked".
I think I am NOT some weirdo believing that being single means being single both in effect and legally.
I know I would never, ever go anywhere near a married man. I think concealing this "little" detail indicates a complete lack of integrity. I think it is a conscious act of cheating.
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I agree completely on this. I am single in the sense that I am a single dad, the mother lives in a different state and we've been separated for over 14 months without any intention of reconciling.
I am in the process of getting the divorce but have not yet. Although there's a part of me taht would like to meet women and maybe have a relationship again, there is that, I am not divorced yet. so in reality I am legally still married.
I do not pursue women, although I do enjoy "looking" and imagining having a date or two, the thing that holds me back is that I would not want to keep the truth of my situation from her and I know that would keep many women from even looking twice at me, and this is justified.
i will say that I don't necessarily think that I'd be wrong to date, if someone were willing to date me, knowing all the details. I don't have a problem with that because I know the divorce is a 100% thing that is going to happen. I'm sure it won't happen, don't necessarily want it to yet since even in the best situation she accepted all of it, it entails a lot of complicated stuff I don't want to deal with.