Welcome to Psych Central! I'm not so sure about the relationship either. In the meantime, I think it is a good idea for you to go into therapy. Now I am not just saying that because I think you are the one who is messed up. I personally think you have some reason to complain. But in therapy, you can talk about the relationship, too--and get some insights.

To answer your question, no, I don't think it's always you.....