I just wanted to add here MowtownJohnny, that often men believe that "loving" a son and being a good father is by being "tough" on their son. And often that is how "they" themselves were treated so they have that "subconscious" message and they don't even "think about it, they just slip into the part their own father played with them". That is often "why" people "think" certain mental health issues "run in families", when what is really taking place is "DYSFUNCTIONAL PARENTING" that is handed down creating the same psychological challenges or "distorted thinking and reasoning".

I took my parents out not so long ago and they are both in their late 80's. Now that I am really recognizing the "dysfunction" I grew up in, when I watch them interact with each other, I see the "same" dysfunction in the way they interact with each other. I talked to my T about this, because I think it is "sad" and he told me, they are never going to change and it's too late for them to actually recognize their dysfunction either. It's not that they are "bad" people either, they are just too used to treating each other in hurtful ways. There was too much "hitting" in my home too, because of that to this day I have an exaggerated startle response.

It's time for you to "comfort" that child in you that didn't know how to defend himself against this bully of a father.

There are plenty of men that function fine with only one testicle, I have a feeling that is why men are born with two, so they have a "back up" and can still reproduce. If your parents had been educated in parenting, they would have known that little boys tend to be "sensitive" about this area and it is very important to take time and sit and talk to them and reassure them when or if they have problems. I have spent a great deal of time around young children and it is "very common" to see little boys holding on to this area in protective ways. Often little boys will not ride my ponies, not because they are afraid of the pony, but because they are afraid it might hurt what they feel is a fragile part of themselves. So I understand how traumatic that medical issue was for you, and I am very sorry you didn't get comforted and reassured when you really needed it and must have been very "frightened".

(((Hugs)))
OE