I really hated that age too but if you can pretend let you being nurturing loving mom then when they become a preteen their much easier to stand. also because you know you have this issue you generally a lot better parent because you have to work harder at it. We generally very negative towards behavior that we find unacceptable like crying, but we are very warm to him when he comes to us and talks about his issues. you're not a cold hearted b****. you just don't like kids, and unfortunate everyone says that your own kids are different but thats not the case. I find it more difficult for my kid then others because I can get the kids back to their parents. Generally I would just be you would like that parents are coming home any moment and you're just babysitting them. Try be the best babysitter in the world, make sure that in as many extracurricular activities as possible, and that they go to bed on time so that you can have adult time and unwind. I think everyone has ages that they like and they do not like unfortunately we have to go through all the ages. Try not to be too hard on yourself and if you have a therapist you should probably talk to him and her about it. It took me a good eight years to get over the way that my son left my body and not be angry at him for it but there's no way for him to tell or anyone outside looking in.