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Cheers for the links, I will look through. As mentioned I have practice delayed ejaculation for a while and have got good at it. I could do Kegels, I used to for a while, but I really believe this problem needs to be solved from the top down, it's a (psycho)neurological issue.. just building up muscles in the penis isn't solving the conditioned response of sexual hyper-arousal on being close to/thinking about a woman.. that's what I'd like to resolve.
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You're welcome for the links and I'm assuming you're under a new username? yes I know just strengthening the muscles won't solve the problem but your case is unique so I didn't want to emphasize the traditional med route. Hopefully that new med will help with the hyper-arousal. Usually a man with PE is told not to think about sex to calm down the arousal but you said that's not the problem. Its good you're being honest with your doctor and try not to worry or anticipate failure because this makes it worse obviously. Hopefully this will get better soon. The exercises will help any man to have more control. Best of luck.