First, I'd like to start off by saying you are not the only person who has fetishes or have this particular fetish. I too, have a fetish that makes it hard to find someone.

Although it's not supposed to be for dating, Fetlife is a great place to start for research. They have forums for those new to the BDSM world (yes, your type of fantasy is part of BDSM even without the whips and chains.) There are people there who are looking for romance, play partners, subs, doms, Masters/Mistresses, anything you can think of. They have groups for people in your area and for people who have the same fetish as you. Some groups are for social get-togethers like bowling, trivia games, and dinners, and some groups are specifically for play.

I would say that unless your fetish is interfering with work or daily activities and you wish to not have these fantasies, I would embrace them. There's no shame in your fantasies no matter how strange. I think that perhaps if you knew that there are many people like you and even women like me who would love to subdue and peg (strap-on sex) men, you would feel much more comfortable in your skin.