for me it's an achievement

I am not the first!

how many millions have been me before I ever was?

I guess it's levity that occupies this seemingly empty space...

I feel like my business is complete...

I battled an invisible beast but a beast nonetheless...

a seriously vicious one

one that healed much quicker than I ever did despite the wounds I inflicted upon it!

and it was all inside my head

there was no beast outside of me

I was at war with myself...

the most dangerous combat...

so that's what I mean... death is no longer a threat
I am not facing off with the real thing every freaking day

something has changed...I am gentle
this way I can live longer and grow old and understand my extraordinary bipolar human experience gracefully...

instead of violently