I do have wars with myself, some days are worse then others though. Most recently my wars has been my mind has been taunting me that I am about to lose everything that I have worked towards and that I am slipping backwards again. For me it really feels like a battle where I am trying I keep my head above water. I don't think depression is selfish, on the surface it can appear that way but there is always something deeper driving it even if you don't know it yourself...