What Dexter said. And also what Ozzie said about us all being at different levels.

When I started the most recent pity party thread, I was a little down, but I figured having a party would be a more fun way to get some support than if I were to just post about being miserable and wanting to hurt myself, and that maybe we could all have some fun with it. I still have ups and downs, but I've come along way. I didn't used to have ups.

When someone is perpetually miserable, and people try to help them and that person just persists in being hopeless and miserable, it does get frustrating. Then it feels like all of our efforts are futile, and that's even more discouraging when the people trying to help are still struggling themselves. But sometimes that's where that person is. I've been accused of wallowing too. Maybe sometimes wallowing is ok, as long as it doesn't go on too long, but you are right in that wallowing doesn't get anybody anywhere. Even when others try to throw the wallower a rope and pull them out, it is still up to them to grab onto the rope and make some effort to get out of the hole.

So, you do have a point. Wallowing forever doesn't help. But there is a difference between wallowing in a hole and expecting to be rescued, and having an off day or week and asking for some support. If the people having a party in a hole are actually having fun and enjoying each other's company, then we aren't really stuck and miserable even if we were close to that situation, and even if we invite others who are stuck in their own individual holes to move over and join in with us at the party hole. Maybe misery loves company, but sometimes company can dispel misery too. It's a fine line - all a matter of attitude. I guess you can tell the difference by how the conversation goes down in that hole. Is it, "life is so miserable," or "come share good food and company with me for a while."

<font color=orange>"Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill "</font color=orange>