(((JAN))) Gentle, comforting hugs if they are okay.

I understand and I'm so sorry you have lost someone dear.

I seem to go to one extreme or the other. Sometimes I cry and can't stop.. for hours, days.

Many times though, I just cannot cry. There seems to be no point and it is a carryover from my youth, when to keep myself from even beginning to cry I would ask myself "What is the point.. when there is no one to comfort you?".

The point...is that you are entitled to your feelings. Your punishment for having those feelings was cruel and was really about your abuser's inabilities (to understand, to empathize, to show love and comfort, to control him/her self).

Cry and celebrate your feelings of love and loss, for your friend as well as yourself.



I hope you feel better very soon.