I behave much the same way that you do - I can't handle being touched unexpectedly, and I have trouble in relationships... if something is too one-sided (so oral and whatnot) where I'd feel like I was being watched? Can't. Just can't.

I wasn't molested as far as I know. I did, however, grow up in an environment where I was basically deprived of physical and emotional affection, so I suppose that is why I have SUCH problems with it.

Do you go and talk to a T? As you're already diagnosed with depression and anxiety, it would be really beneficial to talk to someone about what you do and don't remember about your childhood.