Well done for getting out of bed, getting up and doing things. It sounds like you are really trying to not let this beat you. Give yourself some credit for that. Its not an easy feat.

Do you have a T or pdoc to help you with some coping techniques and if required meds adjustment?

Its really hard when you are down, even when people suggest things they can seem impossible. One thing that has really helped me is to get outside every day. Get some sunshine for a little while. Even in the lowest of lows this helps clear my head a little so I can then keep on fighting. I am super lucky I live in a place with a lot of sunshine but Im sure if you just sat outside for a morning tea or coffee that would be just as beneficial.

Keep posting, there are a lot of people that can relate to you here