hi guys **** how do i start criekey I've been feeling very very down for about 3-4 months now maybe longer i can't honestly say i remember to be honest

I don't know what my problem is I keep avoiding social contact I avoid relationships the first r/s I was in was one where the guy liked me alot; it was only last year I was in one actually, but I didn't feel connected to the guy I stayed because he made me feel better about everything & I just wanted to try and make someone else happy so I could know I've done something worthwhile in life. now I miss him/it? so much and now he's moved out of the UK I've been feeling from DISTRAUGHT to genarally feeling like rubbish and like there's not really much ruddy point in anything anymore and all for no reason wtf??

another thing is i have very few friends about 2 or 3 and even then i don't feel all that close to them anymore I'm 19 but I feel like life is passing me by and I'm very down that soon il be 21 and still a worthless nobody with nothing to really live for :/ I don't mean to sound extreme but i Honestly don't know what's keeping me here-not wanting to make anyone alarmed though I hope you can understand what im saying without me having to put anymore hints...
Yeah, it's like that...

another thing is i can't find work i keep trying and applying but hardly anyone is getting back to me and it's getting me very down it's getting harder and harder for me to put on a happy/i'm ok face everyday and I find it hard to eat and drink most days or bother with doing anything I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HELP MYSELF THINGS AREN'T GETTING BETTER AND I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE I CAN TAKE!!!!!!!