I have felt this way as well, however, I have looked into different beliefs, and honestly none of us know the truth about death, I do know this, My luck is so bad, that I most likely wouldn't do " it " right and end up way worse than I already am, I can't imagine my depression on top of maybe being paralyzed or brain damaged or disfigured. now with that being said, I have been in a great many situations such as car accidents that weren't my fault, but that should have either killed me or left me severely crippled, And they didn't. I have also walked in bad neighborhoods, and have not had one bad incident. All these situations have only shown me one consistent thing, I survived for something, of course I am not suppose to know what this " something" is, and as bad as I feel with my depression and Crohns disease and my childhood molestation, I have to keep this in mind, there were plenty of chances for my life to have been taken, so with this I think, I know that if the universe didn't take me and God didn't take me, then I surely wouldn't succeed in doing it. I am not a gambler, so if I wouldn't gamble money, then why would I take such a risky chance with my life. trust me, I am not happy and I believe death would end suffering, but that is my belief, but what if it isn't that way at all, what we don't know is so immense. We could all be here right now, suffering and in pain and going through all of this because maybe we have died already and we could all be in hell, this could be hell, how would we know? bottom line is there are to many questions and open ended " what if's " for me, so I have made peace with the at least that portion of my life, I am going to keep on going, good, bad or indifferent and in pain and probably depression, until whatever powers that be decide I have met my debt. Maybe this has helped someone,hopefully, we all want to think that death is the cure all but truth be told it could be just the start of something all together different that we would regret. Remember this, The grass IS NOT always greener on the other side. Cricket.