Quote:
Originally Posted by Nicks_Nose
I've seen girls keep photos of guys they had fun with in the past or photos of celebs they find hot saved on cellphones. Tit for tat. If girls can go gaga over guys' booty why can't men? When women fought for gender equality, I took that to mean equality both ways. If we want to be able to oogle a cute guy's butt, then we shouldn't condemn guys for it. It all depends on what each person expects of partners and themselves. If a female does not like it and she does not keep photos of former partners herself, then by all means, fairness and respect both ways. However, there are relationships where looking at a cute behind is not offensive to either partner so it all depends on each person involved.
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Your examples are not exactly relevant to the OP's situation, as her issue is not with her partner keeping photos of past partners or hot celebs, nor with her partner looking at other women. I agree that there is usually nothing wrong with any of the above.
Her partner is doing something different - he's taking sexy photos of women in a manner that makes it seem like he specifically gets a thrill from not having their consent. It's not the sexy image that's the problem, the problem is the rush that he feels when he's doing something sexual to/with his partner without her agreement.
That being said, OP, I feel like you should talk to him about it. Tell him that you don't want him to take partly nude/sexy photos of you without your consent. That's really all you should have to say. If it's a fetish of his and you're willing to accommodate it (not that you have to be!), perhaps you could tell him that he has ongoing permission in certain situations to take photos of you without your knowledge. I wouldn't blame you for not wanting to go there, though, especially as there's some trust issues at play now.
His response SHOULD be sincerely apologetic, he should realize that he's crossed your boundaries and feel really bad about doing that. If you get the vibe that he's brushing you off in any way, or if you feel like you still don't trust him to not do this again, then perhaps it's time to reconsider being with him. Trust is key in relationships and there are plenty of men out there who would never want to violate it and who fully understand how creepy the above behavior would come across.