Thanks for all your replies.

£20 is a lot to me; I grew up on free school meals as my dad was ill and my mum a homemaker. My parents have never spent that on me all on one go! I have to budget strictly as h spends money like water and I don't deal well with accepting gifts.

Reflecting back, I suppose I was talking about CSA and myself, not my house being clean - years ago when I started we would have explored this, but she started into a story about herself as soon as I had finished. She doesn't do therapy with me anymore, we talk more equally.

I want to leave, but I feel I have to stay or she will get lonely as she's semi retired.

I feel so stressed and depressed about my infertility, but my t really doesn't understand this and believes we bring these issues on to ourselves in some way. I'm a Christian girl, volunteer and spend my wage to charities, I don't know what I've done to deserve this.