I don't know where to begin. Most days I feel nothing at all. I guess whenever I feel an ounce of happiness, I begin to worry immediately about everything involved. I start to become frightened and many bad memories, painful memories, return to my conscience. Then I slowly ignore all of those emotions and return to my normal state of emptiness. I hate it, I often think of hurting myself just to prove I'm not dead. I never have though, and I can't say for certain if I ever will. All of this has been going on for 8 years now. Does anyone else ever feel the same way?