Imo growing up once is enough and your therapist is playing dumb. That t knows evetything about it and doesn't care about the outcomes it produces for you.
My former t did some of this to me.
You could become ultra critical of women.

This is going to sound crazy...
But you would be better off if your t was a contract killer and kidnapped your real mother and tied her up in an abandoned warehouse...then brought you there to to make the decision of mercy or justice.
Once the decision is made...no more of this good enough or not good enough crap...
Once your decision is made which I'm guessing she'll be shown mercy, then your mother comes face to face with the idea that YOU rescued HER from YOU and the effect she had on you.

This is just fantasy you understand.
The idea is to see the possible outcome of your toyal and full empowerment juxtaposing your therapist impairing that empowerment with assuming a powrr role you've already experienced.

Better to see ypur therapist as a hitman and yourself as the head of the five families.