I've been reading in the relationships forum that many people (mostly men) think that if you're married that you're obligated (meaning to me, forced) to have sex with your spouse. I want to be in a relationship someday, maybe even married...but I don't want to be forced into sex through twisted psychological warfare.

It's that sort of thinking that would make me more ashamed to have sex and of my sexuality in general. All I'll be good for is pleasing someone else? And what if I'm not good at that?! And what if I'm not good enough, unable to physically do something they ask, or not willing to have sex 100% of the time because, hey, sometimes I'm in pain or really depressed? But if I really loved this person, then I should just roll over and take it, right? That's what guys believe correct? That's what both genders believe ultimately, right? And if I don't just roll over, they'll just go cheat on me and/or leave me.

This is the same in relationships before marriage too, isn't it? How long will someone wait before they say, forget this, I can go get sex/intimacy somewhere else! Do you know how much pressure that puts on people already terrified of intimacy?