biplol, you may just have to accept that you are doing better than you thought......I mean, that you are actually ok.

God knows your heart. God knows you screw up once in a while.

God loves you.

Reject all those who try to put a bunch of phony rules and regs on you........it's a bunch of crap.

Be a Friend of God.....go with your conscience.

You don't have to be perfect, you just have to WANT to be exactly what God wants you to be--and keep moving there, even if it's slowly.

Hey.....relax and have fun. God is a good God.