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Interesting on the reluctance, I’ll mull the concept over. I definitely see and feel it happening and yet haven’t been able to change it. Taking it one step more seems to be a protective measure because as FeeltheBurn mentioned less than 4 months isn’t adequate to do the super deep work without unraveling at the end. How FeeltheBurn describes her T2 is how I see my new-T. She’s insightful, thoughtful, compassionate, funny…. all strong qualities I react well too yet no bond or deep connection is there. I’m letting myself down and not trying hard enough. You know, if I just did more it would be there and I could move forward. Instead I’m blocking myself. I’m stopping myself from feeling the potential grief, sadness and loneliness that could occur by having a connected therapeutic relationship.
New-T isn’t cognitive based, however, she might consider it if the alternative is I cease sessions. I’ll ask her tomorrow as when we previously discussed the disconnect her primary response was to ask for more time. She has 25 years’ experience and provided examples of how differently referrals adapt. Some jump right in as if no change took place, others meander and take the long road then some leave after 3 or 4 sessions.
Unfortunately T does not do a sliding scale. I was up front when we started that we’d end in December, between my fall vacation and hers plus she closes her practice 12/14 – 12/31 we have 18 total sessions. Tomorrow will be our 6th one. I have no issues discussing the financial aspect of treatment and she understands without insurance I’ll need to stop.
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