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Originally Posted by MotownJohnny
Startle response. Mine is tremendous at times. It doesn't take much under many circumstances. Someone coming up from behind and surprising me is going to get to hear me scream and maybe say a few choice words. My heart rate goes through the roof.
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Many times I find mine is (not on purpose) exaggerated and this is usually when little noises in the background are pissing me off. When I dissociate (numbness) I don't startle at all and I'm fearless. I don't even feel like anything is real when I'm in a state of numbness, I feel like everything is just a dream and I'm going to wake up in my bed with a hard-on the next day. Its because I've had dreams about having dreams, and have to do some reality testing to see if it is true or dream. Which isn't always accurate because I've felt pain in my dreams before.
My heart rate gets so bad during stress its considered hypertension or "prehypertension" aka high blood pressure. That's probably why I wanted to drink so bad yesterday, I wanted to ease my tension, I sleep pretty good. Had some weird dream/nightmare hybrids.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MotownJohnny
I'm sorry, I wish I could offer you more than that.
I never want to be in that position again either. It's awful to feel like life is one big smack down with no rules.
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Its all good Johnny

sometimes it does feel like life is one big smack down, I can't escape the drama, it follows me.
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Originally Posted by JaneC
I am so jumpy at times that my colleagues are often having to tell me 'its ok Jane its just the wind, or just a truck going by' etc. I have always startled easily, and scream like the girl I am. I remember being in the cinema one time watching a horror(of all the silly things to do) and got such a fright that i screamed and threw my popcorn all over the people all around me. very embarrasing although my friend laughed I was petrified and spent the rest of the film with my head buried in my coat.
And I am constantly hypervigilant....noticing what i think is somethig moving out the corner of my eye to find it is nothing at all. But my heart pounds for a while because it doesn't know that.
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It does get better, it used to feel like I was going to have a heart attack every time somebody would say hi to me. There have been times where my own shadow made me jump. I used to scream to, now I just jump. Definitely can't do scary movies anymore either, which is a shame because I used to love scary movies. I was an adrenalin junkie, now I can't stand the adrenalin and once it happens I just want to make it stop. Yes when I look back I've had PTSD for years it just got more severe over time as the trauma's piled up one after another until I was so tense I was feeling physical pains. I think seeing something out of the corner of your eye and then turning and seeing nothing is common when we are deprived of sleep. When you find a way to sleep better you will manage better, when we are sleep deprived the symptoms are exaggerated.
Sleep is the best way to reduce stress, it just sucks when you are so stressed in life even your dreams stress you out.
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Originally Posted by A Red Panda
Hypervigilance isn't just the startle response though (I've got a huge startle response too - I jump at my own hair touching my arm and my own shadow!)
It's also when you don't really pay attention to it, but as SOON as someone else's facial or body expressions changes... you jump immediately into high alert. Or where you notice the really subtle changes over time of how someone acts/talks around you. At first you don't know that you're noticing them, but after noticing how you've reacted you can usually figured out what caused the reaction.
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Good point, again thanks for your contributions to this thread.

I am the same way in conversations, I pick up on non-verbal cues and get all sorts of defensive and spooked for what seems like (to other people) no reason. Body language, facial expression, tone of voice, how they use their hands, how they phrase their words all can put me on high alert. It makes interactions with people who don't know how you suffer miserable.