Okay, here goes... I'm a 50 year old woman, married to the same man for 26 years, and my sex life bores me to tears. It's always the same thing, and it's always planned out, starting with my husband saying "We're going to have to fool around sometime soon."

We're both very reserved, private people, and I have issues with our kids hearing what's going on, so I understand the lack of spontaneity. My husband works a lot, and even when he's at home he's constantly dealing with work-related phone calls and emails. What he does is important, and I understand that too. I even understand that he's tired and stressed, and that's why he's okay with going weeks without touching me.

The problem with all this "understanding" is that it has made me draw away from him and has lessened my attraction to him. A lot. It almost feels wrong when he touches me.

I used to think about having an affair (why not? He did.) At this point I'm not sure it would be worth the effort. I've repressed my desires so much that most of the time not even masturbation helps. And no, it's not menopause; this has been going on for years.

Before you respond, please be aware that I have talked to him about this. He makes excuses, and gets offended when I try to get him to change his technique. It's like I'm insulting his manhood if I suggest that we try anything different. I just don't care anymore. It's going to be the same boring routine for the rest of my married life, and it doesn't seem worth the effort to try to get through to him.