I'm sorry you are going through all this....but I really feel for your wife and all her siblings. You are telling me that you hate your wife's eldest sister. Please understand....it was not her fault too. She was thrust the responsibility of raising her siblings....that was a job beyond her. She may have been sexually abused.

She deserves as much sympathy as your wife's other siblings and your wife. They all have grown up to be dysfunctional adults and that's why they are deviant. You can't be a normal adult if something so traumatic happened in your life.

If you wish to chart out a clear enemy in your head - chart out your wife's irresponsible psycho dad and their selfish mom, who just abandoned her children.

You said that you wish your wife would never see her siblings. On the contrary. They need to talk about it....because only then you can expect some resolution. They actually need to go for a group therapy....so that they can normalise their relationship.

If you find money to be a problem....why not try online consultation.....I think it is cheaper. But all siblings need to resolve this together....it can't be swept under the carpet. There are a few outsourced psychotherapy....it might be cheaper. (please search "feel talk".)

But this kind of thing is too big for people to deal on their own.

As far as you......please, for a while put sex behind. Think of it as a crisis moment. Give it some time...dark clouds will pass. And I agree with you....marriage is for better or worse, till death do us apart. Be there for your wife as a friend for a while. Slowly things would go back to normal....maybe better. Also, it would be good if the wife and siblings can complete education. It opens mind and gives a sense of normalcy and structure. Also, it can bring better pay.

Good luck!!

P.S - If the psycho dad is alive....why not ask him to pay up.