Quote:
Originally Posted by dismantle.repair
I know I've been depressed for quite some time. I've been able to fight it.
I got into a car accident... and though I wasn't injured badly (just a few cuts)... I'm wishing that it was so much worse... Not so people would know and feel sorry for me, I just want this pain to feel justified. Damnit.
I have no idea what to do.. I feel like such a freak.
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Had a very similar experience recently. A trip to the hospital that wound up being fairly minor had me hoping for the worst so I could just slip away with dignity. And, as you said, it had nothing to do with wanting people to feel sorry for me. When I was in high school I made up a story and told some of my close friends that I had tried to kill myself...it was purely because I wanted them to give me attention and tell me how much they'd miss me if I were gone. This was completely different...I just was hoping for an easy way out.
I don't know what to tell you, but you're not alone.