TRIGGER ED

Fox- That is all I have drank for the past 15+ years, and 20 oz is a large improvement for me. I'm drinking and not just chewing gum. I've tried for years to drink other things, my intake both of fluids and calories plummet when switching liquids. I'm aware of the horribleness of mountain dew but things like this can never be easy. THIS is why I have no thyroid, and am scared that the meds are messing me up so much. I had (have?) no metabolism and I guess no thyroid fixing those things can be very dangerous because we have no way of knowing how long I've been without thyroid functioning and how my body will react. My eating habits are not going to change this is my good. In this situation if I am working my way to an upswing my intake will drop to the point that I will not put anything in my mouth including meds and water. I tend to get violent without meds.

Hospitals are not a good idea right now:
My ability to understand what is going on right now is low. I'm easily scared,which can lead to paranoia and me trying to rip out the IV. Then that means they sedate me, fill me with 3 bags of fluid then release me in the care of my husband. Which leads me to feeling so violated and my intake drops to nothing. Worse is when I get hospitalized. I wish it was simpler but it's not.
Keeping me in the mental health system, medicated and alive is a very complex situation. I worry GP did not talk to pdoc first because I know T didn't know and T's suppose to have a heads up. There's also the issue thyroid messes with my mood. So messing with one med may mean an adjustment to another.

I know I sound like a little kid but right now with my fear, anger, unpredictability and lack of sleep my comfort area is important.