Had a very similar experience recently. A trip to the hospital that wound up being fairly minor had me hoping for the worst so I could just slip away with dignity. And, as you said, it had nothing to do with wanting people to feel sorry for me. When I was in high school I made up a story and told some of my close friends that I had tried to kill myself...it was purely because I wanted them to give me attention and tell me how much they'd miss me if I were gone. This was completely different...I just was hoping for an easy way out.

I don't know what to tell you, but you're not alone.