Jane - I would be triggered horribly too if someone said that they COULD have a good relationship with me... if I just lost weight. Sorry, but that person is a TOTAL douchebag and is not worthy of your time. No one that incredibly shallow is. I would have had the same reaction you did.
I always had troubles with my weight - I was a heavy kid, but wasn't fat or that really. I still look at myself and think "fat", but I HAVE realised and try to accept something: my family was in DIRECT control of what I ate. So whatever size I was as a kid? They created that, because they fed me. I'd get in sh** if I didn't finish a meal, and we ACTUALLY got in trouble if we drank real juice which was for my mom's daycare, instead of the koolaid that was for us.
Like, really??
It's alright to be upset right now. What the person said to you was TOTALLY inappropriate.