After having many experiences where the people who were supposed to have my best interests in mind basically played to the exact opposite- and these interests were regarding various aspects of my health- I have developed a significant aversion to health care providers in general. I call it an aversion, but it's closer to a feeling that they are more a threat than any kind of help. I know logically that is pretty ridiculous but you can't logic your way out of everything all the time. At the top of that list are neurologists, for some very specific reasons, which I won't discuss here.

But I had an appointment with a new neurologist this morning. It was not, objectively, the most horrible thing to endure in my entire life.
However, I pretty much never want to go back ever ever ever and feel the entire thing was a pretty degrading experience. Not entirely due to the fault of this specific neurologist, but likely due to the fault of all the crappy healthcare providers I have seen before him.
Which goes to support my theory that whenever we are reacting, we are likely reacting not only to now, but to everything that has ever happened to us up until now as well.

So... My morning was freaking lovely.
I'm going to crawl under a blanket for a bit and regroup.

...at least I found a place to swim?
Heh.

Grr.