When you are suffering like this it helps to keep seeing your T and talking things through. You are a realist and understand that no one can fix everything in your life. That is commendable. Sometimes we just have to keep "going through the motions" as you say, until life circumstances change for us. Sometimes T can help us see things differently and sometimes they are just there for support. Hopefully, your T shows you support and respect. If they do, then they care. Keep going. T's can help us get through some very difficult times in life. A little bit of hope is a good thing.