First I would like to thank everyone for thier replies and concerns, you guys are family to me, for those who have been keeping up with my posts , I have been struggling these past two weeks with emotional distress, insecurities, questions, ups and downs, even resorting to smoking pot, flashbacks, anger towards t, resentment, abandonment issues, transference towards male group t.
catastrophising (sorry for mispelling) about everything.

Topics I wanted to discuss as soon as I got into our room ( within 55 min)

1. Transference, wanting to go back into group needing valid reasons to keep me away from group.

2.Not answering my voice mail while in crisis
3.Struggling with flashbacks (csa) nightmares
4 Insecure about therapy and trust issues
5.Therapy once a week instead of every two weeks
6 Inappropriate behavior by my friends boyfriend towards me that threw me into a series of serious flashbacks which led me to call crisis hotline

Topics actually discussed in session:
I didnt do it in a specific order I was rambling on I was so anxious so these were the topics discussed.

1. Voice mail ..... She was deeply apologetic because she did not get the voice mail, I belive her because in the past she has answered my calls. She felt horrible, she called the hot line admin and they advised her that I did call, she was deeply apologetic.

2. Friends boyfriend inappropriate behavior....Not a safe place for me, I shouldnt visit there anymore and of course not smoke pot anymore, he is not a safe person and crossed boundaries with me, we are processing what happened that day, and working on those flashbacks and coping skills.

3.Pushing people away as soon as I start to feel close to them or trust them, especially in a therapy setting... She notices a trend with me that as soon as I started feeling a connection with her and started opening up, I started shutting down slowly, because she knows I have abandonment issues and wants me not to push her away, she told me to let her help me, that she is not going anywhere, she also told me that she knows the fact that when she pulled me from group because of the transference affected the connection we had, and we are working on strenghthing the connection again.

Transference..... At this point there was only ten minutes left in the session and as you can imagine I was all wound up, and had to do a bit of relaxation skills. I did not want to discuss this at this time because I knew we did not have time, so I opted just to wind down the session going over coping skills. What do you guys think?