My son has struggled with intrusive thoughts for a few years. He was only taking antianxiety medication. For the most part, he could handle his intrusive thoughts until they became unbearable when he recently became depressed and his anxiety and OCD increased. The doctor put him on the antidepressant Zoloft. As we slowly increased the dosage, his intrusive thoughts subsided.
Basically, I'm telling you to seek medication if you're not already taking it. My son is also learning how to not OCD latch onto these thoughts and have mental horror compulsions over them. He understands these thoughts don't mean he's a bad person and that he's not likely to do them. He is so horrified by the thoughts and that's why he OCDs about them because he tries to fight them. Everyone has these awful thoughts, and just brushes them aside. But people with OCD fixate on them and can't let them go. So part of it is learning how to acknowledge the thought and let it float away. Easier said than done. But that will help you much better than distraction---like a movie or video game.
Please know you're not alone. Talk to your doctor. There is hope. Good luck to you.
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