I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed and frankly, anxious that I might have lost the skills or inner resources to pull through this rough, really, really rough patch of my life.

After a recent breakup with significant other I experienced a serious worsening of my bpd and depression symptoms. Well, no surprise there so far - such emotional trauma would shake even a perfectly healthy person to the core. What is not at all expected though is that everything seems to be falling apart in my life. Absolutely everything.

It appears that I am facing a serious physical health issue that's giving me a real fright at the moment. My living arrangement is compromised. I find it near impossible to carry out basic tasks, let alone work. I have symptoms that make me doubt my diagnosis - there is just too much dissociation and really weird stuff going on. I can't sleep. I have become addicted to self harm.

The worst thing is - while I had largely been drowning in pain, confusion, I recently found some sort of a genuine will or at least desire to pull through, to move on and I am shocked to realize that I don't seem to be able to.

I have become practically dysfunctional and I have major issues with memory and concentration and that scares me.

I am receiving therapy - on no meds at the moment - but everything seems so incredibly slow; I'm sinking much more quickly than the lifeboat can possibly get to me and if I'm honest, I doubt they actually have life rings on board. Meaning - I feel so much "ahead" of those trying to help me.

I feel really isolated.

I'm not really posting to fish for sympathy; I really do think that it is up to me and me only to get better somehow but I really seem stuck; more than ever in my life.

I'm wondering if anyone might have some constructive ideas.