I have moments like that, too. I don't think this is that strange of a thing to happen. I have certian songs that I have to change stations the minute they come on or it will take back the past in a flash. I, also, have been struggling for years and have the same wishes as you. I get tired of it all and wish there was an easy way out, but somehow I keep going one step at a time. Hope you get to feeling better soon.