You can forgive yourself, it will just take time. I would suggest counseling to help you get over your guilt.
I can relate to your story, except I actually did cheat on my husband as well as cybersex. I was in a very manic episode that lasted quite sometime. We are still married and he has forgiven me and so have I. I realized I was sick at the time and did things I would not normally do. And that's the way he looked at it too. It was a symptom of the illness. It is history.
So you have to realize that you did these things when you were sick. You take responsibilty and go from there and forgive yourself.
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin
"Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
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