My therapist hugs me because I ask him to. It took me close to two years to talk about it with him, but now if I indicate that I want a hug, I get one. It's entirely my call. He won't offer one without some specific indication from me that I want or need one. Before we talked about it, the only touch between us was a handshake the first time we met, again, initiated by me.

For me, it's a comfort thing. I'm big on touch. Touch is soothing and grounding to me. I use touch to self-soothe; I stroke my cat's fur, a soft piece of fabric, my own hand, whatever. I think that after so many years of touch being punishing, being able to control the touch and having it be good is very comforting to me. A good hug is better than anything for me.

My T hugs like he means it, too. None of those wimpy, arms draping over your shoulders kind of hugs.