Secretum, have told you many times in the past that I have faith in you, still do.

James and Venus are both onto something. I agree that being stuck in ones mind is escapism, I bet there are many of us that have done this. I did for years and years, because daydreaming was better than the life I was living. But if I choose not to adress this and just kept dreamjng I would never be living the life I want. I don't think there is a pill for this one.

Why does it never work out? What is it that keeps you from following through? It's hard to follow through on anything if you are hating on yourself. It does take belief in oneself to bring goals to fruitation. Maybe that is what you are missing.

I am finally working on acheiving my goals. It's new terrain for me to have real solid belief in myself. If I look back through my life usually the only thing ever really standing in my way has always been me.. Luckily if anyone can overcome the obstacle of "me", that would also be me.

I am a little didferent than you maybe, although similar in thoughts of having to be an acheiver, failing was never good enough the way I saw it. But I was also a "no man" or woman. Presented with an opportunity I would instantly decline out of fear and lack of bellief in myself at the same time as failing not being good enough...all the while having a fear of succeeding...funny how that works. So I am leaening how to become a "yes man" . But that yes, has to start in my own mind.

And that nike slogan, for as much as I may not love the corporation...the slogan "just do it" very much is in line with saying yes, and way not do it. There is no good reason not to. And there is no good reason to ait around thinking about doing it, so just do it works for me.

I don't believe it is what is natural for us but is what is comfortable, what we have learned to do and do so automatically that it feels natural. Why can't that evolve just as we do?

I think it is the result of hating yourself ..at least in part, wanting and needing to be an acheiver and at the same time lacking the faith in oneself to pull it off so you retreat inward because that is where you can acheive in dreaming and not have to deal with you. There is no pressure in daydreaming, no failure, and once you do succees there is no pressure to keep producing the same results consistantly.

Like Venus I want to see you succeed, I want you to love who you are and I want you to have the life you desire to have. I want you to be able to create it.

And also the result of often feeling like something is beyond our control, or out of our hands, like a seperate entity that can affect us but we cannot affect it. Until we see that it is coming from us, it's not really some other thing, it's us. If you realize that you may start to realize that you can affect it, you can change it. Bur you know I would say that about bipolar and adhd and any other illness or obstacle in life, there is always a way to work with it, or beyond it. Your enprisoned but yet hold the key to freedom.

"What appears to be coming at you, is coming from you" ~ Jack Flanders business card.... a very wise insight I think

Just wanted to add to James and Venus's posts.