i have this problem since child hood and now its worse, i think thats the reason i dont have friends
in school i dont like forcing my schoolmates to be my friends, i just get thoughts inside my mind like this maybe it will be annoying to jump on them and tell them i want to be your friend, maybe they doesn't want me, maybe i am bad to be friend so i end up lonely.
in net i feel more free and speak as i wish and do what i want, but now i get same thoughts but more. what if i said something wrong and couldn't explain what i want, what if the person laughed at what i said
my parents recently worsen it much more, they are always busy and doesn't concentrate when i tell them something, and sometimes when i talk about something serious i am thinking about my dad get a joke out of it
and i just hate bothering people or make them angry from me, if i ever i did and know that i really did i might bury myself
now i am fearing from people responses that i might never speak with anyone not even here where everyone free to talk about anything