I'd been on 10mg of Paxil for a year, and I recently (two weeks ago) increased it to 12.5mg. The Paxil helped my panic attacks, which is the reason I've been clinging to it. I had no apparent side effects from being on the 10mg. But after changing to 12.5, it seems that I'm more depressed. I don't know if I actually /am/ more depressed, or if I just think I am, or if the Paxil is actually causing it. It might not be. Sometimes I just feel more depressed than usual.

It's my first year in college, I live in a dorm by myself because my roommate moved out, and I haven't really made any friends. I've never really had any friends ever in my life so I wasn't expecting to make any. I have classes at 8 in the morning and when my alarm goes off I just feel this deep depression set in the very second that I wake up and I feel like I just want to fade away and give up on everything.

I've been feeling physically sick as well, and I don't know if that's from the medication or not. I haven't thrown up but there's just this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I have no appetite... just the thought of food makes me feel sick. But I don't want to lose weight, so it's seriously frustrating because I just DON'T want to eat.

I don't know what I'm looking for... it's probably not even my medication causing this... because I've been depressed for seven years... but I just feel so hopeless. It's a vicious circle; I'm lonely, but I'm too shy and too much of a misanthropist to make friends; I don't want to be depressed, but I'm too uncomfortable to see a therapist. I don't want to live anymore. I'm tired of it.