i am learning a lot from this thread and agree with much of what Alex says.

when i worked as a substance abuse counselor, i found a few patients that i had a lot of difficulty establishing boundaries with. no fault of theirs.....it probably had to do with earlier experiences that i had had and subconsciously, i would "cave".....i'm not having any difficulties now with the geriatric patients, but i was having difficulty with a younger woman when i was working at a clinic here.

in my mind and in my past experiences, i think it is within the T to establish the boundary and work with it. i feel that this T is blaming you, Rap, and i don't find that very healthy. or wise. i know you're determined to work through this with the T, but it might be better for you to start with someone new.

you know you can "interview" Ts....i have. and i've been interviewed. one man told me that i was crazier than he was......and i told him that he was probably right and that we would make arrangements for him to work with someone else.

i admit preferring to work with patients that aren't substance abusers. and i KNOW that comes from being married to an alcoholic for 13 LONG years.......so, our past experiences definitely play into how we do things.