My advice........... You are clearly stressed beyond words. If it were me, one thing that greatly added to my stress level was being dishonest or *keeping* information from others.

I have gone to TOTAL honesty over the last couple years and it has helped a lot.

So - I advise you to tell your counselor and get help.

Then AFTER you have gotten help, then deal with your parents. And I would be very surprised if they did not simply love you more. I know you "feel" like they would be upset - but NOTHING is more upsetting to a parent than the thought of losing a child.

That is my advise. It is your decision.