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Originally Posted by Tollhouse
Out of curiousity, how is your therapy psychodynamic? Psychodynamic therapy has a main focus of the relationship between client and T. The transference (including love) is worked out and the relationship is the vehicle for change.
It doesn't really keep "focused" and is not directed by the T.
If you read about psychodynamic therapy, it is very much all about the relationship and feelings towards T, etc.
Just wondering....
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Focus is a word I chose because my T has to keep me from diverting the discussion. This is a means I use subconsciously to protect myself. Again, it may not be significant for others the way it is for me.
Psychodynamic therapy is very much about relationships, and the client-therapist relationship is critical, but there is a lot of debate about its exact role. It is sometimes called the
therapeutic alliance.
Warmth and openness are critical, but the role of love is a debated point. For some clients and for some therapists it may be important, but not for all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdog123
I do have to say that while my T and I do say "I love you," it takes about 15 seconds every month or so. When I initially started saying it we did talk about it and what it meant a few times briefly, but this is over the course of the 300+ sessions that we've had. So it's not at all our focus. Expressing love with these words (because we express it other non-verbal ways--hugs, how we look at each other, her deep concern for me, etc.) is organic and we focus on treating my past trauma and abuse, not on our love - this just is, no need to focus on it.
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I did not say that if love was a part of the client therapist relationship that it had to be the focus, just that for
some it will be. For others it is there but not central, for others it is not there at all, and perhaps should be, and may be later, and for others it is not significant or perhaps not present at all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by purplejell
Thanks everyone for the lively discussion... Sounds like the word "love" has different meanings and contexts for different people, and it probably depends on your individual therapy situation.
I guess for me I just wonder about the boundaries... I don't want to get confused about her role in my life. Sometimes therapy is such an enigma. Such deep relational stuff that you do, but she's still also a professional and I pay her. I know it's genuine coming from her - that she really does care.
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It is a complex relationship isn't it? One description of the therapist is, "a person we map our feelings for various other significant people onto, allowing us to explore and examine them".