For several months I have wrestled with how to dis-engage with my in-laws. Finally, after 20 years of marriage, I have realized that my extended family really does not care to have a relationship with me(even I have worked overtime to gain their affection). Evermore, it has become apparent that they are not open to anyone OUTSIDE their core family unit. My husband sees this too and supports my point of view. I do not want to detach if there is anyway possible to salvage this family relationship, but I have not witnessed any concrete evidence that they want anything other than a distant, superficial connection. If I am deeply honest, I do not beleive I want to be close to them either. How do I know for certain, that 'pulling back' is the appropriate response?
Signed,
Imobilized