This is the OP
http://forums.psychcentral.com/bipol...ml#post3287931
I am still taking 200mg of lamictal a day as prescribed.
So it's been 3 weeks, and I just don't feel right, and it is setting in.
I am over anxious, moody, irrational - PTSD related anxiety (separate), but I am more sensitive.
I have never really addressed it with any psych, but it seems like minor OCD is coming out worse now.
My PTSD is related to not feeling safe in my home - I find myself checking my locks, many times each night, primarily. It's obnoxious, I tell myself I just did it 30 mins ago, but I need to touch it to make sure. Then I have to go to the other door because there are two, lol. It's happened before, but worse now -- late at night, perhaps normal condo noises, if I hear anything, it's like my head amplifies it as to someone being in the hallway, and I will go to the peephole and look. This too can happen multiple times a night. My biggest fear is that I might be worse off than "just" bipolar.
I can also fixate on things like being over worried about fire because I have dogs (a damn box of tissues 6" from a candle in glass jar and I am shifting things around to move them away), or making sure my car is locked, even though it beeps, I have to do it one or two more times.
--
It's coming out in my relationship too. A stable relationship (for me
) otherwise. I'm not physical, and would never hurt her, but words sting too. I don't call names or degrade, but I am too quick to speak at times and can be argumentative...and stubborn (I can thank my dad's genetics
.
There are many changes in my life, most importantly a job transition, and I feel a bit lost.
Sorry if this is a bit choppy, I feel a bit off right now but felt I needed some advice of sorts, and sometimes typing things out helps too.
I am going to see the psych in a week and a half (2nd visit with new one), and I got the blood tests she wanted as well. As much as I had musical meds, I need something else to balance me out. Even though I was a low dose of lithium, but for 8 years, I think I need something better to take it's place.
I feel like I went from 70% balanced, to 30% balanced, I'd at least like to get up to 80% for now
Thanks for reading.
Nick