I’ve always considered myself to be an extreme introvert. I’ve taken a personality test (Myers-Briggs) with a therapist and in the section for introvert/extrovert I scored 100% introvert.

Recently I’ve started working full time, it’s my first real job, before this I had only worked part time jobs or just was not working at all, and I’m very thankful to be working. But the main issue that is coming up for me is that with this schedule I have very little time alone. When I don’t get enough time alone I get extremely angry and it can be unbearable at times. It is effecting my relationships with my girlfriend, friends and family because when I do have time off such as weekends and evenings I cherish it and I keep it for myself. I blow off the rest of the world and I feel that I need to in order to cope.

People keep asking me to come out all the time and I just get infuriated by it to the point where I feel like they are being inconsiderate just by inviting me. I feel like yelling at them saying “I don’t want to go to your stupid party!” But I can’t actually do that so instead I ignore them or I lie to them and say that I am busy.

I have even been seriously considering breaking up with my girlfriend. This whole thing has got me to thinking about whether or not I want to get married or have kids. I used to really want marriage but now I’m really not sure that I do, I don’t like the idea of living with someone and having to be around people all the time like that. So what’s the point in pursuing this relationship? It’s not fair to her or me. I have already been taking a lot more space from her as it is and she is feeling really hurt by it.

These days I spend about 15% – 20% of my week being alone and it’s just not enough, it is starting to really drive me crazy. But I feel like there is nothing I can do about it. I’m really struggling for control in my life. It feels like other people are making all my decisions for me and I hate it. I can’t express how mad it makes me. I just don’t fit in with normal society and busy schedules.

Anyway, I feel very alone in all this, I’m sharing with you in hopes that someone will relate. Also, does anyone think this is a diagnosable condition?

- A