I don't want to remember my past because from what I hear it was a total f***up . my brain remembers most of the bad stuff . It just seemed to detach itself from me in embarrassment, like it said I will come back when your depression has a break ,mean while I will leave you a couple of brain cells to tick over on . I remember hospital and I am always reminded every six months on my check up. I hate going but if I quit then i get struck off the hospital list , and if I get really ill have to start the hole process from the start.