Hi. How are you feeling now, now that a little time has passed?
Did you get home safely? Do you live with any other adults, or just children? Did you tell your friend at the coffee shop how you were feeling? You should reach out to at least one person in real-life and ask for help or tell them what and how you are feeling. Wondering if you've gone to bed/sleep yet?
I do like the title "I want to die but my hair looks good". It reminds me of me. A new pdoc said to me the other day " I can't help but notice that you are well dressed and have perfect makeup on. You can't be that depressed". Can you believe it?
Do you usually use humour as a coping mechanism? I do. Sometimes I use humour when it's not appropriate, I just can't help myself. Can't cry, so I laugh. Do you ever feel that way? Will you ph or visit your doc tomorrow when you wake up? I think you should. You may need a med change or a dose increase. Maybe while you are so suicidal you should pop into psych ER and get assessed.
Do you ever go in the chatrooms here? I've never seen you before, so it's nice to meet you. Feel free to come to chat and hit me up for a talk whenever you're feeling down, bored, lonely etc. I'm on at all odd hours because I live in Australia and I work nightshift.
Do you feel like you're over your immediate crisis or do you still feel as bad. Sometimes a good sleep and a new day are enough to get you over the worst part. Have you had any therapy or treatment for your pill use? You might need some. It sounds like you self-medicate a bit. I understand because I do it too. It's really not a good idea though. There are better ways to cope and it's not very healthy for you. Anyway, I hope you're feeling better now and I hope to see you in chat one day. Good luck, take care and please keep us posted on your progress and any other developments.