I am such a bad mom. I'm reluctant to follow through, try to negotiate, constantly give warning after warning, etc. everything I know is not good parenting. My biggest problem is that I am lazy, tired, frustrated, and let my emotions be a part. My kids know they are pushing my buttons and I can't seem to bluff it. They are good kids, and generally don't misbehave, but when they do it's a large struggle. I do always come out on top, but after the screaming crying long temper tantrum and the rest of the week being one long authority struggle. I feel like I have to yell, which I know doesn't work and is counterproductive. The other problem is I just don't have an authoritative personality or demeanor. I'm just "not scary". I'm short, and apparently cute and loving and made to follow, not lead. How the heck am I supposed to change that?! I've tried different inflections of my voice. months at a time of different reprimands, but I just can't seem to get it down. What am I going to do when they really start thinking on their own?
But I certainly know the theories behind good parenting, why can't I follow them into my home?