For years and years I did believe it was impossible to stop and I hated myself so much and hated that I did this to cope. But like others said, I really had no other way to cope. No one was there for me, even my parents disregarded me and all my problems. I tried and failed so many times, I dont really even know how many times I tried to stop...but it was for a majority of my life that I tried to stop and never thought it would happen. No, no real miracle happened for me all of sudden to stop. It was very very gradual and so gradual my change that I didnt realize it was happening. I know I sound like I dont understand but I do. You sound like you really dont like yourself and I dont know you but I am sure you are a wonderful person, I mean I can tell you are a very sensitive person like alot of us are, this can be a weakness but also a strength because in the future it will help you understand other people more than the "average" person. Please dont give up. I am really sorry things are so hard. When I first quit I just made it a goal not to do every day but maybe every other day and then it kind of just helped it from there.